- Step 1 - Go ahead, you can cry if you want to
- Step 2 - Treat yo’self
- Step 3 - Do not open those old wounds
- Step 4 - Reconnect with people
- Step 5 - Get back on the saddle
You were ready to jump in and take the chance.
You steeled yourself for a commitment. You already envisioned a future together. And oh, how badly you wanted to grow old together!
But then the worst thing happened: the offer to purchase contract was not accepted and you now lost the house of your dreams.
You have wasted soooo much time and energy over the past few months and now you are left with absolutely nothing to show for it.
Of course, you are upset and it is okay to feel hurt. Getting over losing a home will take some time but it is not impossible.
Step 1 – Go ahead, you can cry if you want to
It really is okay: let it out. Allow yourself to grieve over what might have been.
Your friends and family might have already started telling you that it was ‘just’ a house but you know it was so much more than that. It was your independence, a new start, and a property investment that now seems far out of reach.
No one is expecting you to be all smiles and start looking for a new house.
Get over this one first before you go looking for a rebound. This will only cause more heartache.
Step 2 – Treat yo’self
You put everything into the thought of buying a house. You put down every last Rand that you could save so that your deposit can grow.
You probably have not left town in who knows how long because you were scared you would miss a listing, right?
And when last did you pay attention to your other hobbies because you were so focused on this one?
You deserve some you-time. Plan a trip, a getaway, or a night out with your friends. You will get that perfect house but for now, you need to get out of your head.
Step 3 – Do not open those old wounds
So, you are sitting in the car, on your way to work when you suddenly find yourself parked in front of the driveway. You can say that you ‘accidentally’ drove past your dream home but who are you fooling here?
Avoid going to the house or in its direction as much as you can.
It is not going to do you any good to check whether there is a moving van there or to see who the new homeowners are. Take it off your browser history and avoid any reminders you may have of it.
Step 4 – Reconnect with people
You need to have a good talking to with yourself.
It was just one house!
It takes some people years before they find the right house that they like. And it is not the only house you will ever feel attached to in your entire life.
Sometimes we are so wrapped up in the dream that we lose sight of reality. So why not opt for a change in scenery?
Instead of sitting alone at home, moping, step outside of your comfort zone. Join the local gym or go for art classes if that is your thing. Reconnect with people that will give you a different perspective on your heartache.
Step 5 – Get back on the saddle
When you are ready, you need to saddle up and ride that pony again. Know that it is okay to get back out there and find the one that you want.
When you look at how many homes for sale can be found, you will start wondering why you were so hung up on one particular house.
Do not be scared of disappointment. Sometimes you need to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince.